So, Here We are... Again.
My kids have already finished their math and science for the day, they are working on geography and the SAT "spelling words" we are working on for the week. I'm allowing myself a few minutes in front of the computer on this hot September day, to think on what we will do next while on this adventure. Shall we take a field trip tomorrow? Maybe spend the day laying in the sun at the state park NEAR where we live. :-) We could just be completely lazy tomorrow afternoon and devote the hotter part of the day to the silly movies we still love to watch over and over again. These are the choices I love being forced to make. As we started several weeks earlier than public school, our system of work doesn't involve all the classroom hours devoted to working with students that need extra attention or time spent on "busy work" to fill the time frame, we can be flexible with our time. If they catch on to their math work and fly through the problems assigned with ease, we can move on to another lesson or we can take the rest of the day to just ejnoy this wonderful world God has given us.
Not all days are this easy. There are days where they are both struggeling to grasp a concept, and I am struggeling to teach it. Maybe we all got up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe there are other issues that I am personally dealing with. We still have flexibility, but things then begin to get complicated.
Things are often complicated in one's life. Some seem to have more of it than others, for a number of different reasons. Having an issue of health, like Fibromyalgia can add to your complications. It can add to the stresses that a normal life already has attached to it. What if a family member is dealing with an addiction? What if there are financial issues that just never seem to go away? What if you, while dealing with your illness, are dealing with or taking care of someone else with an illness? The what if's can add up and become overwhelming if you let them. I know that I've been overwhelmed by those "what if's" many times.
There is hope in this dark world. I believe that because I've experienced it so many times. I'm not saying you won't struggle, or have to deal with sorrows, but in the midst of all that there is a glimmer of light that you have to grab hold of and wallow in from time to time. It's the only way to live a life with any joy. You have to revel in the moments when that light makes itself more apparent, or you choose to notice, and remind yourself to look for it always, but especially when the darkness starts to surround you. I truly believe that God is there with me in every aspect of my life. He's there when I am hurting, crying, in pain, suffering, bewildered, overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, confused, healing, smiling, laughing, joyful, loving, and exhuberant! He's there, well... becasue He says he is. His love letters to us tell us that he never leaves nor forsakes us. Those letters don't say that He will or can fix every problem in our life, but they do tell us how to find joy in the midst of persecution, pain and suffering as well as happy and wonderful times.
We live in a broken world. A world that is overwhelmed with a dark and opressing list of maladies. If you escape this world without scars, cuts and bruises on your very soul and heart... then I am simply amazed. God wanted to give us paradise, but we screwed that up, so here we are... but He chooses to be right beside us. Beside us even when we don't deserve it or ask for it. Why? Because He said He would be.
Psalm 56:8 You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, Each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.
One version says He saves each tear you shed in a bottle. Wow. I only keep things that are worth something or that mean a great deal to me. Why does He keep track of these things that no one else might give a flying flip about? Because they matter to Him. They ARE worth something to Him. YOU are worth everything to Him. I don't know what you are dealing with today as you read this, but please know how special you are. How important you are. You may feel alone or overwhelmed. I've been there, and I can tell you from personal experience that in those times, He's hugging me all the tighter. He wants you to notice that today. Sometimes He offers a glimmer of light to get you through and sometimes it's a full on spotlight. I don't pretend to undertand the reasons or the why's. This thing is a lot bigger than me, and I don't pretend to be the center of any universe. I know He's there, and if that is all I am ever capable of understanding fully... Then that will have to be enough to get me through.
Let Him show you some little sparkle of His light today.
Psalm 16:11 Now you've got my feet on the life path, all radiant from the shining of your face. Ever since you took my hand, I'm on the right way.